in search of

how the golden hour can make the divine out of dust

vishvarupa.

Find a god in your sleep or in the sky.

A god for your wishes and a god for your fears.

A god to help with the dishes when you need the day to be over already.

And another god for the passage Rafi must walk from here to middle school. And then a god for all of middle school.

Find a god to clear a path from your mind to your heart, but beware of trick doors and sinkholes; your wise heart awaits.

Find a god for forgiveness, for those times nobody knows about that haunt you. The ghosts of all things unseen; all those little phantom shames you still feel.

Find a god for love and make a bridge that connects you to all the kinds we don’t even have words for. The Greeks have four types, and this has always made you long for your extended family. A glass shatters, and they cheer, "Opa!" Nothing has broken. Instead, tiny shards, like offerings, lift into the air with Athena, Eros, Artemis, Prometheus, Hermes, and the grieving mother, Demeter.

Find a god for your taxes and for pumping gas.

And for God's sake, find a god for the news.

Even when it’s not on, and this is most of the time, find a god for the volume landing on your skin–all the little portals of your being where the catastrophes of our world sink into your bones.

Find a god for pleasure, and let it open up your life like all those flowers already blooming.

Find a god for time travel, use the map of spring to follow how liminal cross quarters are; how sometimes it is spring and also winter.

Find a god for transitions and bend with the rhythm of your own life, expanding and contracting like breath, or those capillaries in the whites of your eyes and at the center where everything dilates.

Bow to the eye behind the eye, watching from within, it is being called to be your guide. Then find a god for sight.

Quick, find a god for fifth-grade math homework.

And at sunset, find a god for all the things you want to say before bed, before they hand themselves over to another day.

Then, find a god for rest, and lie down, stopping first on your knees to pray.